Holy smokes world of ver.., p.1
Holy Smokes (World of Verdenian Book 2), page 1
Holy Smokes
D.L Howe
Copyright © 2023 by D.L. Howe
All rights reserved.
No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher or author, except as permitted by U.S. copyright law.
Contents
Dedication
Epigraph
Triggers
Playlist
Prologue
1. Chapter 1
2. Chapter 2
3. Chapter 3
4. Chapter 4
5. Chapter 5
6. Chapter 6
7. Chapter 7
8. Chapter 8
9. Chapter 9
10. Chapter 10
11. Chapter 11
12. Chapter 12
13. Chapter 13
14. Chapter 14
15. Chapter 15
16. Chapter 16
17. Chapter 17
18. Chapter 18
19. Chapter 19
20. Chapter 20
21. Chapter 21
22. Chapter 22
23. Chapter 23
24. Chapter 24
25. Chapter 25
26. Chapter 26
27. Chapter 27
28. Chapter 28
29. Chapter 29
30. Chapter 30
31. Chapter 31
32. Chapter 32
33. Chapter 33
Epilogue
Acknowledgements
About the Author
I want to dedicate this book to my friends Heids, Stef, Louise, Cass, and Jessi. There were several moments in the process of writing this when I questioned if it was a good idea. If I was good enough. And all of you have been my biggest cheerleaders, not only for this book but for many.
Thank you for always believing in me.
Be careful when you cast out your demons that you don't throw away the best of yourself. -Friedrich Nietzche
Be careful when you cast out your demons that you don't throw away the best of yourself. -Friedrich Nietzche
People shouldn't call for demons unless they really mean what they say. -C.S. Lewis
The more perfect a person is on the outside, the more demons they have on the inside. -Sigmund Freud
If I got rid of my demons, I'd lose my angels. -Tennesse Williams
Triggers
This is a naughty little tale about a demon seducing a priest. So, it shouldn't come as a surprise that what's inside these pages is extremely sacrilegious. I at times even made myself blush and feel uncomfortable. There is a lot of degradation, but rest assured it is entirely wanted whether our sweet, naive, protagonist believes it or not. My dirty demon is unsurprisingly lacking in morals, well morals as far as humans are concerned, he has his own qualms. So, at times he might do or say something that doesn't sit right with you. I'm afraid he's very unapologetic. Lastly, in Chapter Thirty-One there are several scenes of torture and graphic violence that very well might make your stomach churn and haunt you into the wee hours of the night. If this could have been avoided, trust me, I would have.
After all of that, you still wish to proceed I hope you enjoy.
Playlist
The Devil's Chasing Me-The Reverend Horton Heat
I Fell in Love with the Devil-Avril Lavigne
Devil in Me-Halsey
Demons-Hayley Kiyoko
Devil's Child-Judas Priest
Dancing with the Devil-Demi Lovato
Sympathy for the Devil-The Rolling Stones
(You're the) Devil in Disguise-Elvis Presley
Runnin' with the Devil-Van Halen
Devil on My Shoulder-Billy Talent
Devil's Got a New Disguise-Aerosmith
Devil Pray-Madonna
You Me and the Devil Makes 3-Marilyn Manson
Shout at the Devil-Motley Crue
Seven Devils-Florence + the Machine
The Devil in Stitches-Bad Religion
Run Devil Run-Jenny Lewis and the Watson Twins
Lacrimosa from Requiem-Mozart
My Demons-Starset
Nocturne No. 20 in C Sharp-Chopin
Prologue
Blythe
“Are you nervous?”
I glance over my shoulder through the layers of my gauzy veil at my handmaiden, Aoife. She’s a wee brownie with the darkest mahogany skin and even darker stick-straight hair that falls down her back. Her bright yellow eyes are full of concern.
I mull over her question before answering. “I’m not so much nervous as I am angry.”
She nods, understanding.
I never agreed to this marriage, but it was deemed necessary by my royal advisors. After the tragic death of my parents when I was barely knee-high to a grasshopper, the Unseelie court has been in turmoil. I was too young to lead, and as an only child with no other pure-blood relation, it fell to my advisors. Too many cooks in the kitchen, and too many opinions on every single decision until it almost turned into a war.
Meanwhile, the other dark courts took notice and used our weaknesses to their advantage. The Unseelies began to feel like a rag doll being tugged between The Winter and Summer courts as they both tried to seize our land and people. Fortunately, the fae of my court are loyal and fought against them, but it left us all in tatters.
So, what was my advisor's suggestion? To form an alliance with a white court, of course. It just so happens that the Autumn Court has a prince in need of a wife. Sure, Prince Aidan is a comely man, and even though I was of a marriageable age, I wasn’t ready to settle down, let alone become a wife. Not that I wanted any of this. I didn’t ask to be the queen of a crumbling court, but here I am.
“Are you ready, your majesty?”
I barely glanced at Niall, my pushiest advisor. If he wasn’t such a nag, perhaps I would appreciate his beautiful face. As it is, I wish the selkie would put on his seal skin, and swim far, far away.
“As ready as I’ll ever be,” I grumble.
His smug smile is ear to ear as he offers his arm. I grudgingly slip my arm through his, and allow him to lead me to the great oak double doors. Under normal circumstances, I’d appreciate the door's beauty. Carved to appear like the great oak trees in which they were made, and so tall, I have to lean my head back as far as it’ll go in order to peer at the top.
Of their own accord, they gradually slide open, revealing the great hall where hordes of fae are already gaping at us. I do my best to ignore them as I’m led down the aisle that's littered with a rainbow of tiny flowers. Dread fills my heart as I near my groom, yet I’m somewhat appeased to see he’s not as excited for our nuptials as he made out to be. No doubt he’s been shoved into this match as much as I have. At least we’ll be miserable together.
I thought the wedding would be horrible, but nothing prepared me for the wedding night when several high-standing members of both our courts, including my closest advisors and his parents, the king, and queen of The Autumn court would witness the consummation of our marriage.
I’m fretting as Aoife prepares me for bed. “How is this okay? Nobody told me I had to do this in front of a crowd!”
My handmaiden simpers, “It’s very antiquated, but I believe they’re concerned with you conceiving a child as soon as possible to cement the alliance between your courts.”
I growl because that’s exactly what Niall said verbatim, but it doesn’t ease my ruffled feathers. “It’s disgusting!” I seethe.
She nods in understanding. “I’m sorry you must endure it, mistress.”
Aoife and I have always been close, closer than that of a maid and her mistress. She’s been my only companion, and I value her more than anyone, but at this moment I want to wring her neck purely because I’m so spitting mad with no one else to take it out on. But that’s not fair to her, so I keep my mouth shut and silently stew until bloody Niall appears to rush me into my bedroom where my husband and half of our courts stand waiting.
Aiden is wearing an amber-colored dressing gown that highlights his auburn hair. He’s biting away at his bottom lip until he’s noticed my arrival, and his hazel eyes widen as he takes in my scanty nightgown.
I think the only reason he agreed to this marriage was the fact that he wanted to bed me. Let’s just hope this first time takes, and I won’t be expected to share his bed in the future. I’ve agreed to birth an heir to cement our accord, but I’m no broodmare. Nor am I any male’s plaything. I may have no control over most aspects of my life, but my body is mine to do with as I please. I am a queen after all.
I gape as I watch him unrobe to find nothing beneath it. He’s already hard, I notice with distaste.
The crowd murmurs their appreciation. For what I’m not sure, nor do I care. Ignoring the whole lot of them, I climb under the covers and wait to be desecrated. He doesn’t make me wait long before he drags my gown up to my belly and shoves my legs apart. Just before he shoves himself deep, he glances up at me.
“You don’t have to look like this is the end of the world,” he mutters sullenly.
“Easy for you to say,” I spit back.
The squall is loud and robust, and I'm able to breathe easier for the first time in almost three years as my son shrieks in anger. I don’t blame you, baby boy. I don’t want to be here either.
We did not, in fact, conceive on our wedding night, and I was to endure over two years of my husband’s cock before his seed finally took. Pregnancy was the best thing to ever happen to me becaus
“My queen, you must wake up. It’s an emergency!”
Grogginess weighs me down as I try my best to take in my handmaiden’s harried words. “What?”
“It’s Cathal, my queen.”
That’s the ticket that wakes me up in an instant. “What’s wrong with my son?” I demand.
“He’s gone.” She whimpers.
I shoot out of bed. “What in the goddess’s name do you mean, he’s gone?!”
Her face is wretched as she pulls at the roots of her hair tugging out great clumps at a time.
I grab at her unruly hands. “Stop that, this instance, and tell me everything.”
“The nursemaid went to feed him, and his bed was empty, cold to the touch.”
“Have the servants search for him at once!”
She nods spasmodically. “They’ve been searching for over an hour, and they cannot find neither hide nor hair of him.”
“Well, he didn’t simply get up, and walk away. He’s barely a month old.” I screech. “And why am I only just hearing about this now?”
“We didn’t want to disturb you. We were sure we would find him.”
I grasp her shoulders harshly and try to shake some sense into her. “He’s my son, you should’ve woken me immediately.”
“I’m so sorry, my queen.” She cries.
For three days and three nights, every fae in my kingdom searched every inch of Unseelie land. No stone was left unturned until finally on the third night, they found him all alone crying like a banshee. I have no idea how he came to be alone in the middle of a forest, I’m only glad he’s been returned to my arms where I shall never let him go.
As the years passed and I watched my son grow it occurred to me several times that something was off about Cathal. It wasn’t obvious, so I brushed it away as nothing more than paranoia. Yet, the older he grew it became harder to ignore, and I would argue with myself that he was merely a wee babe when he disappeared. But as one year progressed into decades, and my son continued to age while his fae peers stalled as their immortality took over it became impossible to deny. On average, the fae stopped aging in their mid to late twenties, but my son continued on, and at fifty he appears as a human would.
It’s something I’ve discussed with my advisors ad nauseam, and while I’ve defended him because he’s my baby boy I can no longer deny that Cathal isn’t actually my son.
“It had to have been a changeling that stole him that night, and swapped him out.”
A legend that humans always get wrong. Changelings aren’t actually the fae babies that had been swapped, but a sneaky kind of fae that steals both human and fae babies alike. Sometimes they do it only to cause mischief, but other times they’re paid for their thievery.
In this case, I believe the latter to be true. Someone wanted to crack the alliance between the Unseelies and Autumn courts. No doubt The Winter or Summer court is responsible.
“I won’t let them get away with this,” I inform my advisors as I walk away from their arguing as to what they should do.
Some things never change.
I may be queen in every way, but that doesn’t mean these old fools take me seriously. But I’ll show them.
The Black witch is young and untried, but she’s the first to agree, so beggars can’t be choosers.
“Are you sure this is the best course of action?”
I glare at Aoife. “If anyone can find my real son, it will be a demon. Asmodeus is the lesser evil of all the princes of hell.”
The witch might be inexperienced, but you certainly wouldn’t know it in her efficiency as she summons the demon prince of lust. Within minutes a stark figure slowly appears.
In his true form, he’s beastly. His humanoid head squished between a cow head and a goat's head. All three are jabbering about one inane thing, or another before the young witch silenced him with a wave of her hand. I’m questioning my earlier assumptions of weakness due to age.
“Welcome Asmodeus. I’ve brought you here for a mission.”
As one all three heads turn on the witch, but it’s only the middle humanoid head that speaks. “You, a wee girl, dared to summon me, a prince of hell?”
A lesser witch would cower, but not her. I’m in awe as the girl stands up straight, her chin held high. “You’re here, are you not? If I wasn’t capable of controlling you, it would be otherwise.”
His black-as-pitch eyes narrow before grudgingly nodding. “What will you have of me, witchling?”
She turns to me, and I freeze in fear as I earn the ghastly figure’s attention. I may have grown up in a dark court, but I’m still a sheltered royal. “Queen Blythe’s son was stolen by a changeling. Your mission is to find Prince Cathal, and return him to The Unseelie court.”
Three heads cock to the side as they study me. I try my best not to fidget under his weighted scrutiny. “And what will I get in return for returning your son?”
I gape. I hadn’t considered the payment and was certain he wouldn’t accept my undying gratitude. “Whatever I have is yours.”
I inwardly cringe at myself for my idiotic words. What in the goddess's name was I thinking?
“Does that include your soul?” Asmodeus asks with a vile grin.
Now I’m outwardly gasping. “I… I… I…”
“I, I, I,” he guffaws. “You sound like a broken record. Spit it out. How much are you willing to sacrifice for the retrieval of your long-lost prince?”
I know I’ll hate myself for this later, but what is the alternative? Enduring my husband’s cock for who knows how long? I’m immortal, the chance of death is highly unlikely.
Before I can change my mind I spit out, “Anything. You can have anything.”
“Then I want your soul.” His faces gleamed with pure triumph.
My hands fist as I long to pull every strand of hair from my head rather than agree, but agreeing I do. “Fine, you can have my soul.”
He approaches, and it’s then that I notice he’s limping. My gaze lowers, and I barely contain my shock at the sight of one bear leg, and one chicken leg that’s a good six inches shorter.
Asmodeus lifts a claw-tipped hand, and a scroll appears. With much flourish, he whips it open and I take in all the small writing.
“It’s a simple barter’s contract that says in exchange for the safe return of your son I will receive the soul of Queen Blythe of the Unseelie court.”
I squint in order to read the tiniest print, but it’s impossible. I would need a microscope to read it.
I huff as I give up. “Do you have a pen?”
He chuckles. “All demon contracts must be signed in blood.”
Before I knew what was happening, he snatched my hand and swiped a sharp claw opening the pad of my index finger.
“How dare you!” I screech.
“Oh, I dare much.” He purrs.
I shiver and widen my eyes. shocked as I feel my core come alive for the very first time. How is it possible to feel desire for this hideous creature?
“You forget who you’re dealing with, my queen.”
We’re separated by a good five feet, but it feels like he’s touching me everywhere all at once. The disgust I would expect is nothing short of orgasmic. I shiver. Barely contain the moans traveling straight from my needy core. I try my damndest to shake it off to no avail. Finally, I shout, “Enough!” The all-encompassing pleasure stops as quickly as it began.
Before he can do something else I swipe my signature haphazardly across the bottom of the contract.
With a churlish nod, he snaps the scroll closed. “The deal is done. I shall fetch your prince, and then you shall be mine.”
I sputter. “You can’t just take my soul. I have to die first.”
He chuckles. “You should’ve read the fine print.”
“You, no good-for-nothing trickster!” I scream.
